Temperatures & Tantrums

When I say that last Saturday night was the hardest night in my motherhood journey so far, I mean it. I am starting out this post with a shout out to my husband. I would have never made it through this last weekend without you. You are the best dad I could have ever asked for to our boys. Also, kudos to all single parents. I have no idea how you do it on your own, and I have major respect for you. If I would have had to take on this weekend by myself, I probably would have had a major breakdown.

This all probably sounds a tad dramatic, but hey it is the first time in my life both boys were sick at the same time. For a newer mom of two under two, this is a big deal. I think Blake and I both deserve a cookie for surviving Saturday night.

Thank goodness it was not CoVid. Cooper has a sinus infection thanks to Tennessee weather, and Eli has a sinus infection with, of course, an ear infection due to drainage. Add in the holidays last week and you have the recipe for ultimate stress. The chaos started when Eli started running a temp of 101 plus Saturday evening. I started panicking and knew we were going to be in for a long night. By 10:00, Eli was fussy, fighting sleep, and in pain. By 3:00 A.M. we still had not gone to sleep, Blake and I had been up taking turns walking the house, and I had given in and put Eli in the car for a drive hoping that would bring relief. Something I said I would NEVER do. Blake and I were at each other's throats. Nothing brings out the best in marriage like being sleep deprived from Christmas then add in another sleepless night with a screaming infant. By 6:30 A.M., I had one of those moments that you see in commercials where moms want to go and hide in the bathroom or closet. I now truly understand how humorous and twisted those commercials are.

I was searching for answers everywhere. Google was not my friend. By this time, Cooper was waking up ready for “Christmas Day 3”. Since Christmas morning he has been waking up saying, “Merry Christmas”, since my living room floor is still covered with toys from Christmas morning. I’m not one to let the Christmas spirit die, so he can keep bringing joy until his little heart is tired of it.

By 8 A.M., finally Motrin (or the fact he had not slept in 14 + hours), brought relief for Eli. Cooper was ecstatic. He had mom all to himself opening up new toys while Daddy and Bubbie took a “nap”. Cooper had the best time. Honestly, I needed a morning like that after the night we had. Everything was going great, until nap time was over.

Everyone wanted Momma. Cooper wanted Momma’s undivided attention. Eli wanted Momma’s love and to be held. Daddy just wanted Momma to fix lunch while he left the house to take Christmas boxes and wrapping paper away. IT WAS MORE THAN I COULD HANDLE. Then it happened. The tantrum of all tantrums. Cooper has been really struggling with sharing with Eli. It has gotten worse since Eli is mobile and grabbing any toy he can get his hands on. I finally had Eli sitting on the living room rug not crying when I walked away. FINALLY. Cooper saw this as the opportune time to also want to play with the new Fisher Price flashlight Eli had. One jerk of a toy away later, both boys were screaming.

Gut reaction said, spank Cooper, give toy back to Eli, but honestly what lesson am teaching there? Second thought, jerk toy back away from Cooper and give back to Eli. Once again, have I taught Cooper anything? The answer is, no. My automatic reaction is to always spank, but lately I have been trying different methods to try to teach lessons while disciplining. The reason and lesson of why Cooper is getting disciplined is the most important thing I want for him to get out of the whole ordeal. I know, here come the parenting geniuses to tell me how to discipline my kid. <BACK OFF> Mothers know their children, what works for them, and DO NOT let anyone tell you any different. All situations are different. Sometimes working through Cooper’s emotions through discussion are more effective in the situation than a spanking. Other times, a spanking is warranted to get the point across and grab his attention. This is not a discipline post nor am I telling you what is best for your child. Me, as mother, am working through this at the moment and journaling about where I am on the toddler tantrum journey.

Long story short, I ended up talking through the situation with Cooper. Two year olds actually understand more than you might think. Once we talked through how Bubbie’s feelings are hurt and he is sad that he no longer has the toy, Cooper decided on his own to give the toy back and pick up another toy. #parentingwin

Did Cooper repeat the same scenario later that day, yes. Once I reminded him how that made Eli sad did he give his toy back, also yes. Want to talk about making you feel validated as a parent for using the best method for you to teach your child.

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Currently both boys are sitting on the living room rug playing well together. Eli is still running a low grade fever, and we will be headed back to the pediatrician this week for the second time if it does not get better. Multiple copays while paying for insurance every month will definitely get me heated enough in the future to blog about it.

Will another tantrum happen in the next 30 minutes….probably. Will another sleepless night due to sickness happen again...also probably. Will this mom pour another glass of her favorite wine and work through whatever life with two under two throws her way...most definitely.

Moms, we are all in this together. Even when it gets tough, remember no matter how well people look like they have it together on the gram, we are all wiping poop and pushing through the screaming fits together. So the next time you need help, ASK. The next time you think you are going to lose it, go in the bathroom, lock the door, and lose it for a moment. You will be glad you did. Listen to all advice, but don’t feel guilty for completely blowing it off if you know it will not work for your family. At the end of the day, we are all in survival mode with toddlers. I hope this made you giggle and relate to the chaos over your favorite pour of wine.

XOXO

-Paige